The Day I Lost My Faith In Humanity
My headphones have been giving me problems. I would be running or whatever and all of a sudden, music would only come through the left headphone instead of the right. So I would go to Radioshack and tell them that their Sony headphones sucked at life and I would then proceed to buy the SAME EXACT PAIR. After the third time returning the broken headphones, I even paid extra for a 2 year warranty in case anything happened to the headphones. OF COURSE something was going to happen to the headphones! I can't hear music out of the right headphone! EVER! Sony! You should announce a recall!
And then? I went to a wedding this weekend and asked my sister to borrow HER headphones because duh! My headphones! They were doing that thing again! And surprise! I put on her headphones and pressed play and thought, "OH MY GOD! My sister's headphones are broken too!!! No sound out of the right headphone except when I jiggle the cord in just the right way...oh.....wait...." And then I realized, 8,000 pairs of headphones too late that maybe, MAYBE it was the iPod! And not the headphones! WHO KNEW!? I DIDN'T.
I trekked into the Apple Store today and realized that I have a crush on every single boy that works there. Except the ugly ones. But more importantly, I puttered around for awhile on a sample MacBook, checked my email a few times, browsed some websites and then oh! They called my name and I went up to the Genius Bar, a little hesitantly I might add, since I've had some previous Bad Luck at the so-called Genius Bar.
But lo and behold, the Genius Mac Man came through for me this time and handed over a BRAND NEW IPOD and promised that would happen for the next year too as long as I bought AppleCare for $63. $63? So I can extend my warranty another year and watch you just HAND ME OVER A BRAND SPANKIN' NEW IPOD FOR FREE? Heck yes. I can't believe I spent all that money on headphones. I am a little...slow.
Anyway, I left the store and there was quite a commotion happening right on 59th Street. Why are there crowds of people hanging out around the Apple Store? What are those video cameras doing there? Why do I recognize that booming voice screaming country music into a microphone? Oh. Yeah. Because it's Toby Keith. Just...playing some music for CBS. Outside. I took a picture with my camera phone because sometimes I am touristy like that. You shall never see it because I haven't yet figured out how to get pictures OFF my phone and onto my computer. Come on. Relax. I only just figured out that it wasn't the damn headphones, you really expect me to extract pictures off my CELLPHONE!? Get real.
I walked to the subway in a great mood, having one of those moments. You know. Those moments. The moments when I realize that even after living outside the hub for 22 years and living inside the hub for 2 years, there are these moments when I see freaking Toby Keith rocking out next to Central Park and I whip out my camera phone and click and then squeal like a girl and want to yell I LIVE IN NEW YORK CITY! I LIVE HERE! IN NEW YORK! WEEEEEEEEEE! Random country music stars and beautiful Genius people who give me new iPods for almost free and NOTHING IS BETTER THAN THIS RIGHT NOW.
Well.
I went home and blinked for awhile and then blinked some more and then stroked my new iPod and then I checked my email. Now, I have three different email accounts. The oldest one is almost 10 years old and people who have known me the longest email me at that address. I want to get rid of it since it's my old AIM screen name and it's a pain in the ass to spell and also, I get a TON of spam there (do you know how much spam you get if your email address has been around for almost a decade? TONS. OF SPAM.) But if you have been reading this blog since it's conception, you probably email me there and hey! I love emailing you! The other email address is a little bit newer and is used primarily for NEW friends. Namely, people that don't have time to listen to an explanation of a screenname I made up when I was 15. The third email address is for business. Whatever.
BACK TO THE STORY AT HAND: I went home and checked my email and logged into my old AIM-name yahoo account first, where I was greeted with one message. Just one. And wait...where are the rest of the emails? Waaaaaaaait. A little confused, I opened up the lone email, assuming it was spam as the subject title was "I DELETE ALL YOU DATA".
And the following message is there:
HI! I DELETE ALL YOU DATA JUST FUR FUN!
IT`S YOUR FAULT. WHY DID YOU CLOSE YOUR MAIL WITHOUT
SIGN OUT?
SO I DELETE YOUR INBOX,SENT MESSAGES, DRAFT
MESSAGES,YOUR FOLDERS,YOUR TRASH, I DELETE EVERYTHING
JUST FOR FUN!
HAVE A GERAT DAY!
...
....
And I wish I could say that it was a lie. But it wasn't. It's true. Whoever it is, spam or more likely, some asshole at the Apple Store who doesn't speak English very well, they really did it. They deleted emails from 1998. They deleted emails from last week. Everything in between is gone too. They deleted saved documents with all my passwords for various websites. They deleted emails that my mother sent me, reminding me of how much she loves me. They deleted birthday wishes, congratulations on booking a show, merry Christmases from college classmates. They deleted love letters from ex-boyfriends, significant emails I kept because sometimes I re-read them and am reminded of how I felt loved and appreciated. When in the mood, I can rummage through my inbox and go back almost 10 years, and find things that make me laugh and things that make me sob. It's kind of like going through my closet, except electronically.
And someone took that away from me. In a matter of minutes. I don't know what else to say because no words can acutely describe my lividity. I am incensed beyond all reasoning and also incredulous that someone would actually DO THAT, would go out of their way to delete things that were very precious to me and THEN have the balls to email me and tell me that they did it and that it was my fault. Pardon me, asshole, but at least I know how to type "great day". And I WAS having a great day until I mistakenly left my email open at the Apple Store and now I'm having another moment, the flipside of that I LIVE IN NEW YORK CITY moment I just described. This new moment is I LIVE IN NEW YORK CITY AND WHY ARE PEOPLE HERE SO RIDICULOUSLY GHETTO AND MALICIOUS THAT THEY WOULD DO THIS TO ME?!!!!! Also, WHY DON'T THEY HAVE A GRASP OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE!? I ASK YOU!
I do not understand deliberately mean people. I never have. And so I'm left here angry at myself because all jokes aside about headphones and being a little slow on the uptake, when things like this happen, I feel stupid. I actually feel that I'm as dumb as I seem sometimes. I know that this isn't the truth but now I will just beat myself up over and over again wondering why I didn't sign out of my mailbox at a public computer in the middle of Manhattan. Who does that? Who is honestly that clueless?
I am.
I'm angry at myself and at the same time, I am angry at people who make me feel this way about myself. I'm angry at people who reduce me to someone who feels ashamed and insecure and foolish. Whoever you are, jerkface snotnose asshat who deleted my entire digital life, I hope you walked out of the Apple Store and got hit by a bus. And then after his free concert was over, I hope Toby Keith crossed the street and stepped on your guts and as you lay there on the pavement, with broken legs and a few cracked ribs, you looked up and realized that everyone hates you, including country music superstars.
And then? I went to a wedding this weekend and asked my sister to borrow HER headphones because duh! My headphones! They were doing that thing again! And surprise! I put on her headphones and pressed play and thought, "OH MY GOD! My sister's headphones are broken too!!! No sound out of the right headphone except when I jiggle the cord in just the right way...oh.....wait...." And then I realized, 8,000 pairs of headphones too late that maybe, MAYBE it was the iPod! And not the headphones! WHO KNEW!? I DIDN'T.
I trekked into the Apple Store today and realized that I have a crush on every single boy that works there. Except the ugly ones. But more importantly, I puttered around for awhile on a sample MacBook, checked my email a few times, browsed some websites and then oh! They called my name and I went up to the Genius Bar, a little hesitantly I might add, since I've had some previous Bad Luck at the so-called Genius Bar.
But lo and behold, the Genius Mac Man came through for me this time and handed over a BRAND NEW IPOD and promised that would happen for the next year too as long as I bought AppleCare for $63. $63? So I can extend my warranty another year and watch you just HAND ME OVER A BRAND SPANKIN' NEW IPOD FOR FREE? Heck yes. I can't believe I spent all that money on headphones. I am a little...slow.
Anyway, I left the store and there was quite a commotion happening right on 59th Street. Why are there crowds of people hanging out around the Apple Store? What are those video cameras doing there? Why do I recognize that booming voice screaming country music into a microphone? Oh. Yeah. Because it's Toby Keith. Just...playing some music for CBS. Outside. I took a picture with my camera phone because sometimes I am touristy like that. You shall never see it because I haven't yet figured out how to get pictures OFF my phone and onto my computer. Come on. Relax. I only just figured out that it wasn't the damn headphones, you really expect me to extract pictures off my CELLPHONE!? Get real.
I walked to the subway in a great mood, having one of those moments. You know. Those moments. The moments when I realize that even after living outside the hub for 22 years and living inside the hub for 2 years, there are these moments when I see freaking Toby Keith rocking out next to Central Park and I whip out my camera phone and click and then squeal like a girl and want to yell I LIVE IN NEW YORK CITY! I LIVE HERE! IN NEW YORK! WEEEEEEEEEE! Random country music stars and beautiful Genius people who give me new iPods for almost free and NOTHING IS BETTER THAN THIS RIGHT NOW.
Well.
I went home and blinked for awhile and then blinked some more and then stroked my new iPod and then I checked my email. Now, I have three different email accounts. The oldest one is almost 10 years old and people who have known me the longest email me at that address. I want to get rid of it since it's my old AIM screen name and it's a pain in the ass to spell and also, I get a TON of spam there (do you know how much spam you get if your email address has been around for almost a decade? TONS. OF SPAM.) But if you have been reading this blog since it's conception, you probably email me there and hey! I love emailing you! The other email address is a little bit newer and is used primarily for NEW friends. Namely, people that don't have time to listen to an explanation of a screenname I made up when I was 15. The third email address is for business. Whatever.
BACK TO THE STORY AT HAND: I went home and checked my email and logged into my old AIM-name yahoo account first, where I was greeted with one message. Just one. And wait...where are the rest of the emails? Waaaaaaaait. A little confused, I opened up the lone email, assuming it was spam as the subject title was "I DELETE ALL YOU DATA".
And the following message is there:
HI! I DELETE ALL YOU DATA JUST FUR FUN!
IT`S YOUR FAULT. WHY DID YOU CLOSE YOUR MAIL WITHOUT
SIGN OUT?
SO I DELETE YOUR INBOX,SENT MESSAGES, DRAFT
MESSAGES,YOUR FOLDERS,YOUR TRASH, I DELETE EVERYTHING
JUST FOR FUN!
HAVE A GERAT DAY!
...
....
And I wish I could say that it was a lie. But it wasn't. It's true. Whoever it is, spam or more likely, some asshole at the Apple Store who doesn't speak English very well, they really did it. They deleted emails from 1998. They deleted emails from last week. Everything in between is gone too. They deleted saved documents with all my passwords for various websites. They deleted emails that my mother sent me, reminding me of how much she loves me. They deleted birthday wishes, congratulations on booking a show, merry Christmases from college classmates. They deleted love letters from ex-boyfriends, significant emails I kept because sometimes I re-read them and am reminded of how I felt loved and appreciated. When in the mood, I can rummage through my inbox and go back almost 10 years, and find things that make me laugh and things that make me sob. It's kind of like going through my closet, except electronically.
And someone took that away from me. In a matter of minutes. I don't know what else to say because no words can acutely describe my lividity. I am incensed beyond all reasoning and also incredulous that someone would actually DO THAT, would go out of their way to delete things that were very precious to me and THEN have the balls to email me and tell me that they did it and that it was my fault. Pardon me, asshole, but at least I know how to type "great day". And I WAS having a great day until I mistakenly left my email open at the Apple Store and now I'm having another moment, the flipside of that I LIVE IN NEW YORK CITY moment I just described. This new moment is I LIVE IN NEW YORK CITY AND WHY ARE PEOPLE HERE SO RIDICULOUSLY GHETTO AND MALICIOUS THAT THEY WOULD DO THIS TO ME?!!!!! Also, WHY DON'T THEY HAVE A GRASP OF THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE!? I ASK YOU!
I do not understand deliberately mean people. I never have. And so I'm left here angry at myself because all jokes aside about headphones and being a little slow on the uptake, when things like this happen, I feel stupid. I actually feel that I'm as dumb as I seem sometimes. I know that this isn't the truth but now I will just beat myself up over and over again wondering why I didn't sign out of my mailbox at a public computer in the middle of Manhattan. Who does that? Who is honestly that clueless?
I am.
I'm angry at myself and at the same time, I am angry at people who make me feel this way about myself. I'm angry at people who reduce me to someone who feels ashamed and insecure and foolish. Whoever you are, jerkface snotnose asshat who deleted my entire digital life, I hope you walked out of the Apple Store and got hit by a bus. And then after his free concert was over, I hope Toby Keith crossed the street and stepped on your guts and as you lay there on the pavement, with broken legs and a few cracked ribs, you looked up and realized that everyone hates you, including country music superstars.
10 Comments:
I have nothing to say besides that totally f'ing sucks.
It does. Not to mention, I had a "Deanna" folder. That is gone too. SUPER AWESOME COOL! *sigh*
Oh, man! So when I'm famous you won't be able to sell my secrets in a tell-all?
I am so ANGRY for you. I'm having such trouble comprehending that a person could actually do that. There's a special place in hell for people who ruin another person's day.
stay strong.
Arianna,
You make life better by signing your name with an exclamation point.
That is all.
Dear Laura,
Get in touch with the technical support people at your e-mail service; they have back-ups of everything. They may not want to do it, but they CAN restore your emails. You may have to wheedle and pay them some amt., but it certainly can be done. Put your bookoos of charm to work, and with some persistence, and a prayer to St. Anthony (finder of lost things), maybe your faith in humanity can be restored. It's worth trying--sooo sorry bad things happen to good people. cheers, Hal
Since St. Anthony's feast day was June 13th, it can't hurt to try! AND, of course, St. Rita is the patron saint of impossible tasks...hence, your mom!
Where is that little brat who did this to you? I will rip his throat out!
Love and Peace,
Your mom
I hate that your really bad day will forever be associated with Toby Keith. I think we should pretend that it was 2 seperate days. So in the future we shall say that you saw Toby Keith the day BEFORE your faith in humanity came crashing down.
Yes yes Alayna that is correct. Toby Keith was positive energy.
Hal, I totally tried to get the emails back but Yahoo! (with an exclamation point) assures me that once emails are deleted, they are deleted. Nothing can be done.
So. The good news is that I'm starting fresh with no emails and no one's email address so. Um. If you ever emailed me in your life, you should probably email me now since I do not have your email address saved. Woot!
Hey Miss Laura. I hucked you onto my blogroll today. Enjoy!
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